This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
