I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I think im going to throw up on grandma
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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