we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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