And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
