Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Edward fifth and chaser hands
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
