Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Randomize
