When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Randomize
