it was like his penis was on wheels.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Edward fifth and chaser hands
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
