I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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