I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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