He is an equal opportunity slut.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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