yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
