weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
