I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm always down for nudity.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
