Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
