dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Im part way to drunk.
I still have a little drunk in my system
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
