similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize