My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
