Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
