Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
