i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize