I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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