Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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