i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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