What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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