Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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