what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
