I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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