the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
