She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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