Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
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