Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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