That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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