we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
