Pappa wants mamma naked
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
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