Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize