Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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