I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
