Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
