I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
