So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Randomize