you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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