Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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