Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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