Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
