i need an iv and a liver transplant
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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