You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
