Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
