At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
