he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm experimenting with sincerity
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
