Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize